Need a Marriage Retreat? Start in Your Closet!

In addition to being a National Speaker and Published Author, I am also a Fashion Consultant.

Fashion consulting is a rewarding business and each client consultation is unique and tailored specially to their wants, needs and if they are married – their spouse’s wants and needs.

My initial consultation with a client begins in the client’s closet. We go through each clothing item, accessory, purse, shoe, etc. and establish which items we will keep based on the 3 F’s:Fit, Fashion, Flattery.


I have the client try on every item; and as she does we see if the item fits. Many women change sizes and hold on to outdated clothes and sizes. I only recommend keeping the client’s current size in the closet. (If they insist on keeping the other sized clothes we put them in storage in another place in the home).

Your clothes need to fit.  I know this seems like an obvious fashion tip, but you probably own things that do not fit you. When clothes are too big or too small women tend to look manly or like “Frump Girl.” No woman wants to look like either of those.


Once you have decided that a clothing item is the correct size for you, next you need to evaluate if it is flattering on you. Every woman’s body is different and just because an item looks attractive on your friend, in the magazine, or wherever you first noticed it, it doesn’t mean it’s your most flattering look.

Check out some of my previous fashion articles about dressing for your body type and colors that look best on you.

If you are married and your husband has a certain opinion regarding clothing he thinks looks best on you, why not cater your purchases to align with his preferences?

Many of my clients – as we are going through their wardrobe and later while shopping for new clothes- inevitably try on an outfit and say something like, “My husband doesn’t like this style on me, but I don’t care.”

Anytime one of  my clients mentions their husband’s dislike of a certain style, I suggest the client listen’s to her husband. Here is why, if in marriage a husband and wife are supposed to “become one,” then why would a wife purposefully do something that she knows displeases her husband – in any area that is not morally wrong – regardless of her reasoning?

Wives, if you know that your husband loves to see you in a higher heal – I am not suggesting you have to wear high heals all the time-  why wouldn’t you at least wear them when you go on a date with your husband? It is possible to find heals that are comfortable to wear for short periods of time.

Whether it is coloring your hair, growing your hair out, wearing dresses more, etc., it should make you happy to make your husband happy.


Fashion trends come and go, but an outdated wardrobe is easy to spot: stained clothes, bleach marks, pants too short, piles on sweaters, clothes that are boxy, etc.  I am NOT suggesting you go to the mall today and buy clothes you can’t afford. I am also NOT recommending you fill your wardrobe with all of the latest trendy items.

I recommend that you visit the mall occasionally; browse through Nordstrom and other classy stores to get ideas of the latest style trends and how to wear them. Nordstrom can be expensive, but you are mainly there to get ideas. You can always take those ideas with you to places like Ross, TJMaxx, etc.

You might still be wondering what your closet or wardrobe has to do with a marriage retreat and I am about to tell you.  Wives, every once in awhile your marriage needs a little boost.


Men are visually stimulated, I can’t emphasize this fact enough!


Since we know that men are visually stimulated, every once in awhile it is good to evaluate yourself and your wardrobe to ensure that you are doing your best to be a woman who visually stimulates her husband.

Your husband is surrounded by women every day, dress and carry yourself in such a way that even if Jennifer Aniston worked with your husband, he would still spend his day thinking about you and how beautiful you are.

This suggestion is not only one that works, but as I travel and speak, I have many conversations with men and every one of them has asked me to remind wives about the importance of looking attractive for her husband.

Wives, when you do everything within your ability to eat healthy, workout, wear clothes that fit, are flattering, and fashionable, both you and your husband will feel like you went on a marriage retreat. Ladies, when you wear pretty clothes, put on a little make up, and style your hair, you too will feel prettier.


When a woman feels prettier, she becomes more confident; because of  her confidence, a wife is more likely to want and desire sex and less likely to feel embarrassed about her insecurities.


She will also more  feel more desired by her husband.

Your next marriage retreat should start in your closet… but what about the single ladies? The same things apply – you want to get a husband someday (well most women), start planning so you are ready when the time comes.

**As I write this article I just want to remind everyone that first and foremost our desires must be in alignment with God’s. We must first and foremost desire to bring him glory and have a pure, obedient heart. Our desire for the Lord and our Love for others will be what really attracts a husband to his wife, the recommendations above do not negate these simple truths, they only compliment them**

(Here is a sneak peak into my wardrobe… I don’t have many clothes at all, but I am good at mixing and matching them!)

For more information about about being sexy, sex, dating, relationships, and trusting God:
Buy the Book!

No Sex in the City
Lindsey N. Isham

  1. Hello Lindsey!
    Just found your blog through twitter…. LOVED this post. I have to say I myself have kept and worn things even though my husband has not necessarily thought they were flattering. You make good points regarding this…. and I may just be inspired to get rid of a couple dresses……LOL

    1. That a girl Kristen! Take before and after pictures and I guarantee you will never but buy bad looking clothing again 🙂

      Loving your husband can be as easy as updating your wardrobe!
      Let me know how it goes!


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