Is Facebook Ruining Your Relationship?

Facebook is supposed to be something fun; a way to connect with people you haven’t seen in awhile… but for many couples, Facebook is tearing apart their relationship.

Status Update: “In a Relationship”

Usually the fact that you are now in a relationship is a good thing… but what if the person you are in a relationship with doesn’t want that information to be public? Some people feel that if you don’t announce your new romantic relationship to the world via Facebook then there is something wrong with you.

The overly analytical types start to wonder, why you won’t change your status to “In a Relationship.” Are you not proud of me? Are you committed to our relationship? Are you having second thoughts? Are you cheating on me? Are you embarrassed by us, and our relationship?

If you are supportive of updating your relationships status, how long do you need to be in a relationship before you update your status? What kind of communication needs to happen in order to do so? Who makes all these unwritten rules anyway?

Comments From the Opposite Sex

As if the above thoughts aren’t enough to be concerned with, there are more. What if you are dating a guy whose wall is covered with gorgeous women who have left comments for him, asked him questions, or have asked him out? What do you do? What should he do?
“Friending” Exes

Who is it okay to be “friends” with on Facebook? If you are married or in a relationship, is it okay to have “friends” of the opposite sex? Husbands, what if women (who you don’t know) send you a “friend request,” should you accept it or reject it? What if an ex (who you know is probably still in love with you – or maybe isn’t) sends you a “friend request,” should you accept or reject the friendship? What if they write on your wall, comment on your pictures and posts, should you keep the comments or erase them? What if your exes send you personal messages, and start asking personal questions?

Although the Bible was written years ago I think it has a lot to say about Facebook and how to handle these types of situations. Most of the above concerns can be resolved with three easy words: Love, Honor, & Trust.

Love: If you really care for someone, you will not insist on your own way. (I Corinthians 13:4-8)

Honor: Your status, updates, friends, accepted comments, friend invitations, etc. should always honor God, the person you are communicating with, and if you are in a relationship- the person you are in a relationship with. If you are truly honoring the other person, you not have any flirtatious, sensual, or suggestive images, or comments on your page and you will refrain from posting such things on others’ pages. (Job 40:10, Proverbs 3:35, Proverbs 11:16, Proverbs 20:3, Proverbs 21:21, Proverbs 29:23, John 12:26, Romans 1:28, Philippians 4:8, I Peter 3:7)

Trust: If you are dating or married to someone you cannot trust, or if their actions are making it harder to give them the benefit of the doubt, talk to them. If your Facebook page in any way gives room for others to question your level of commitment to that relationship, avoid it. Pray about it. Trust God first. Ask Him to guide you. ( I Corinthians 13:4-8)

Relationships are hard enough as it is; don’t argue about the petty stuff like relationship status on Facebook, but don’t allow your Facebook, Twitter, Instagram or other social media pages to be an open invitation to temptation and other sins either, because if you don’t put up any boundaries, odds are in your favor that your relationship will either end or suffer greatly.

*Photo Credit: The featured image is compliments of

  1. Good article, Lindsey. I am a huge fan of FB’s ability to share information and photos with people you really care about, and a huge critic of its role in dating. The only people who need to know the status of a relationship are the two involved in it. So when it comes to FB and relationships, I would definitely only change my status from one type to another: single to married. All other information is worthless and gives room for all of the things you mention above.

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